Loneliness: how it differs from isolation, why it lasts and what helps

Loneliness is the painful feeling that comes from a gap between the relationships you want and the ones you have (WHO, 2025a). Short-lived loneliness after changes such as moving, a break-up, retirement or bereavement is sometimes seen as a signal that pushes us back towards people, the way hunger pushes us to eat; what causes problems is loneliness that lasts, sometimes defined as 2 years or more (WHO, 2025a). You should not blame yourself for feeling lonely (NHS Every Mind Matters, n.d.); loneliness is not an illness or a diagnosis but a feeling anyone can have.

The WHO estimates that about 1 in 6 people worldwide (15.8%) felt lonely in 2014-2023, most often teenagers aged 13 to 17 (20.9%) (WHO, 2025a). In Korea’s 2025 Social Survey, 38.2% of people aged 13 and over said they felt lonely often or sometimes; only 4.7% said “often” (Statistics Korea, 2025).

mind.io does not offer a loneliness test. If loneliness runs so deep that you have thoughts of harming yourself, please do not carry them alone. Reach out to a crisis line right away: call or text 988 in the US and Canada, call Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland, or find a line at findahelpline.com elsewhere. If you are in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services.

Social isolation is the objective state of having few relationships, roles and contacts; loneliness is a subjective feeling. Time alone that you choose, to rest or reflect, is not loneliness (WHO, 2025a). The two overlap less than you might think: isolated people are not necessarily lonely, and vice versa (WHO, 2021). In a 2015 French survey, 62% of people who felt lonely all or most of the time were not cut off from family or friends (Insee, 2019). In Korea’s 2025 Social Survey, too, 44.0% of the 5.8% who had no one to turn to and no regular contact said they were not lonely (Statistics Korea, 2025).

In a Korean survey of 5,511 adults, 11.8% reported loneliness, 4.3% social isolation and 3.4% both, and it was loneliness rather than isolation that was linked with mental health problems. But because this was a one-off survey, it cannot show which came first, and mental health problems can also lead people to see others less (Kim et al., 2025).

Loneliness can come from lacking one close person, lacking people to spend time with, or feeling alone even among people you know (NHS Every Mind Matters, n.d.). You can feel lonely in a relationship or with family (NHS, 2026). On the other hand, time alone that you choose can ease stress: in a study of 21-day diaries, people felt lonelier on days they spent more time alone, but this effect shrank or disappeared on days when being alone was their own choice (Weinstein et al., 2023). Introversion, finding it comfortable to be alone, is a different thing from loneliness; see HSP vs introvert too. If a relationship is controlling or violent, safety comes first: in immediate danger, call your local emergency number; in the US the National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233 and in the UK the National Domestic Abuse Helpline is 0808 2000 247.

Many people feel lonely at least sometimes, but far fewer feel lonely often or always, so figures vary widely between surveys (Surkalim et al., 2022). Even within Korea’s 2021 national mental health survey, counting anyone lonely “some of the time” gave 32.2% (Lee et al., 2023), while an analysis using a different cut-off found about 2.9% (Kim et al., 2024).

In Korea’s 2025 Social Survey, more women (41.0%) than men (35.4%) said they felt lonely, and the share rose with age to 43.4% among people aged 65 and over (Statistics Korea, 2025). Korea’s social isolation indicator, based on the same survey, is 33.0%: the share of people who lack someone to ask for help with chores when ill, or someone to talk to when struggling, or both (Statistics Korea, 2026).

In a survey across 142 countries, 16% in Korea and 17% in Japan said they felt “very” or “fairly” lonely (Gallup and Meta, 2023). In Japan’s 2025 national survey, 4.5% felt lonely “often or always”, and about 40% at least occasionally (Cabinet Office of Japan, 2026). In England, 7% of adults felt lonely often or always, more often at ages 16 to 24 (9%) (Department for Culture, Media and Sport, 2025). Older people reported more loneliness in the Korean survey and younger people in the English one, so it matters which question was asked.

In a 2023 Korean government survey, more than 80% of young people with experience of isolation or reclusion who responded said they wanted to get out of that situation, and among those who had not received help, apart from not wanting help (38.5%), not knowing where to find it (28.5%) was the most common reason (Ministry of Health and Welfare, 2023). Where to get help is covered below.

In an analysis of 90 cohort studies (over 2.2 million people), loneliness was linked with a 14% higher risk of death and social isolation with a 32% higher risk (Wang et al., 2023). An earlier analysis found 26% for loneliness, 29% for social isolation and 32% for living alone (Holt-Lunstad et al., 2015), though people who live alone can still have a large supportive network, so living alone does not by itself mean being isolated (Holt-Lunstad et al., 2010). Poor social relationships, such as loneliness or isolation, were also linked with a 29% higher risk of heart disease and a 32% higher risk of stroke (Valtorta et al., 2016).

All of these are observational studies, however, and the WHO notes that a causal link is difficult to demonstrate (WHO, 2021); people cannot be randomly assigned to relationships (Holt-Lunstad et al., 2010). The WHO estimates about 871,000 deaths a year linked with loneliness, a figure calculated by assuming that the association above is causal (WHO, 2025a).

Adults who were often lonely were more than twice as likely to develop new depression later as those who were not, but most of these studies were in older adults and results varied (Mann et al., 2022). Loneliness and depression often come together: in a 5-year study of middle-aged and older adults, loneliness predicted later depressive symptoms (Cacioppo et al., 2010), and mental health problems can in turn increase loneliness and reduce contact with others (Kim et al., 2025). If low mood lasts more than 2 weeks, see depression symptoms as well.

According to one theory, when loneliness lasts, the mind shifts into an alert mode that scans for social threats. People then see the social world as more threatening, expect more negative reactions and remember them better. Pulling back in anticipation can actually push others away, creating a loop that keeps loneliness going (Hawkley & Cacioppo, 2010).

Many studies have found that lonely people tend to read others’ reactions more negatively and to expect rejection (Spithoven et al., 2017). This is better seen as a common habit of thought that loneliness brings than as a character flaw.

Social anxiety can feed loneliness too: in a study that followed 1,010 adults for 6 months, social anxiety predicted later loneliness (Lim et al., 2016). If meeting people itself feels frightening, see social anxiety disorder as well.

Feeling ashamed of loneliness and hiding it is common. In more collectivist cultures, people tended to see loneliness as more within one’s control and to perceive more stigma around it (Barreto et al., 2022). Loneliness is not a failing; it is a sign that a connection you need is missing right now.

In an analysis of 50 studies testing ways to reduce loneliness, the overall effect in randomised trials was small (effect size 0.20), and approaches that tackled the habit of reading social situations negatively worked best (0.60), while simply increasing chances to meet people showed no clear effect. These conclusions, though, rest on only 4 and 2 trials respectively (Masi et al., 2011). An analysis of 28 randomised trials of psychological therapy, most often cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), also found a small to moderate reduction in loneliness (effect size 0.43), with large differences between studies (Hickin et al., 2021).

A 9-week internet CBT programme guided by a therapist reduced loneliness by a moderate to large amount compared with a waiting list (effect size 0.71), and the gains held 4 months later (Käll et al., 2021). An internet programme with human guidance worked better than one that only sent automated messages (Seewer et al., 2024). By contrast, brief self-guided online programmes did not reduce loneliness more than a general supportive session (Kaveladze et al., 2025).

Start with small things you can do today. The WHO suggests reaching out to a friend in need, putting your phone away during conversations, greeting a neighbour, and joining a local group or volunteering (WHO, 2025b). Rather than trying to do everything at once, set small targets you can easily meet; with a class or group that interests you, you can just watch at first. Simply being around other people, in a park or café for example, can help too. Try not to compare yourself with others on social media, or to use alcohol or gambling to relieve loneliness (NHS, 2026).

In US data on widowed middle-aged and older adults, those who started volunteering 2 or more hours a week were less lonely, but this was an observational study, so it cannot prove an effect (Carr et al., 2018). The evidence for social prescribing, where a doctor or link worker connects you with local activities, is not yet strong enough (Reinhardt et al., 2021; WHO, 2025a). Only some of 24 studies on pets found a link with loneliness (Kretzler et al., 2022), and digital technology programmes for older adults showed no evidence of reducing loneliness (Shah et al., 2021). If you find yourself blaming yourself for feeling lonely, see how to build self-compassion as well.

Talk to a professional if low mood lasts more than 2 weeks, if stress or anxiety feels hard to cope with, or if the things you have tried yourself are not helping (NHS, 2026). The depression check-in (PHQ-9) looks at depressive symptoms over the past 2 weeks, but it is not a diagnosis. If you are worried about depression, see depression: what helps as well.

Outside Korea, a family doctor is a good place to start; in England, you can ask your GP about social prescribing and peer support (NHS, 2026). In Korea, Seoul runs a loneliness phone line, Oeroum Annyeong 120: call 120 (02-120 from outside Seoul) and press 5 to talk to a counsellor 24 hours a day, even if it is not a crisis; normal call charges apply (Seoul Metropolitan Government, 2025; Kim, 2026). Young people who find it hard to leave home or have no one to rely on can ask for counselling and support at a Youth Future Centre or their local community centre. The pilot that began in August 2024 covered people aged 19 to 39 (Ministry of Health and Welfare, 2024); since the Act on Support for Children and Young People in Crisis took effect on 26 March 2026, young people aged 19 to 34 are assessed for how isolated they are and then supported step by step, from daily-life recovery to relationships to social participation, and applications can also be made online through “Youth ON” (Ministry of Health and Welfare, 2026a). Centres are planned in 16 provinces and cities by the end of 2026, but as not every region has a centre yet, the health and welfare call centre on 129 is a good first call (Ministry of Health and Welfare, 2026b). The mental health crisis line 1577-0199 (24 hours) connects you to a nearby mental health welfare centre (Ministry of Health and Welfare, 2025).

Loneliness is also linked with suicidal thoughts (Lee et al., 2023). If loneliness runs so deep that you have thoughts of harming yourself, please do not carry them alone. Reach out to a crisis line right away: call or text 988 in the US and Canada, call Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland, or find a line at findahelpline.com elsewhere. If you are in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services.

Q. Is there a loneliness test? A. Researchers use longer and shorter loneliness scales (WHO, 2025a), but mind.io does not offer a loneliness test. How long, how often and how painfully you feel lonely matter more than any score. If you are worried about depression or anxiety, the depression check-in (PHQ-9) or the anxiety check-in (GAD-7) can help you take stock, but they are not a diagnosis.

Q. I like being alone. Is that a problem? A. Time alone that you choose is different from loneliness (WHO, 2025a). If time alone feels comfortable and restful, it is not a problem. But if you are alone more than you want and it hurts, that may be a sign of loneliness.

Q. Will meeting more people make loneliness go away? A. Not necessarily. Approaches that only increased chances to meet people showed no clear effect on loneliness (Masi et al., 2011). Loneliness comes from the gap between the relationships you want and the ones you have rather than their number (WHO, 2025a), and you can feel lonely even with a partner or family (NHS, 2026).

Q. Is loneliness as harmful as smoking 15 cigarettes a day? A. The US Surgeon General’s advisory compared the higher risk of death linked with lacking social connection to smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day (Office of the U.S. Surgeon General, 2023). But that comparison covers lacking social connection in general, not loneliness alone; in a large analysis, the higher risk of death linked with loneliness itself was 14%, smaller than for social isolation (32%) (Wang et al., 2023).

Q. Can a pet or an AI chatbot help? A. A pet can be a comfort, but the evidence that pets reduce loneliness is mixed (Kretzler et al., 2022). The WHO says digital technology and AI may help but that their effects and risks need more study, and it notes the risk of becoming overly attached to a robotic companion (WHO, 2025a).

Q. A family member hardly leaves the house. A. Try to show concern rather than blame. In Korea, young people can ask for counselling and support at a Youth Future Centre or their local community centre: the 2024 pilot covered ages 19 to 39 (Ministry of Health and Welfare, 2024), and since the Act on Support for Children and Young People in Crisis took effect in March 2026, those aged 19 to 34 are assessed for how isolated they are and then supported step by step (Ministry of Health and Welfare, 2026a). As not every region has a centre yet, families can first ask the 129 call centre for guidance (Ministry of Health and Welfare, 2026b). Elsewhere, a family doctor or local mental health service can advise. What families can do is covered in Hikikomori (prolonged social withdrawal).

Q. I feel so lonely that I have thoughts of wanting to die. A. Please do not carry them alone. Reach out to a crisis line right away: call or text 988 in the US and Canada, call Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland, or find a line at findahelpline.com elsewhere. If you are in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services.

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