Perfectionism: how it differs from high standards, why it is rising and what helps

Perfectionism means setting very high standards and judging yourself harshly against them. Psychologists treat it as several dimensions rather than one trait. In 1991, Hewitt and Flett described three: self-oriented perfectionism, which demands perfection of yourself and evaluates your own behaviour stringently; other-oriented perfectionism, which demands perfection of others; and socially prescribed perfectionism, the belief that the people who matter to you hold unrealistic standards for you, judge you harshly and pressure you to be perfect (Hewitt & Flett, 1991). Frost’s scale from the same period measures concern over mistakes, doubts about your own actions, personal standards, parental expectations and criticism, and organisation separately (Frost et al., 1990).

Researchers group these dimensions into two broad bundles: “perfectionistic strivings”, setting high standards and pursuing them, and “perfectionistic concerns”, worrying about mistakes and others’ judgement and doubting your own actions. A 2006 review concluded that the strivings side can be positive, as long as people are not overly concerned about mistakes and negative evaluation by others (Stoeber & Otto, 2006). When this guide says perfectionism makes life hard, it mostly means the concerns side.

Perfectionism is not a diagnosis. mind.io does not offer a perfectionism test. Research scales exist, but this guide prints no items or cut-off scores. We found no national statistics on how common it is. In a 2014 survey of 1,176 workers by a Korean job portal, 67.2% said they pursued perfectionism at work, and 75.9% said they did not think perfectionism made people happy; these are self-descriptions, not scores on a research scale (Financial News, 2014). This guide sets out, from research, how perfectionism differs from high standards and conscientiousness, why it is rising and keeps itself going, and what helps.

High standards are not the problem in themselves. The researchers who proposed the clinical perfectionism model defined clinically significant perfectionism as self-evaluation that depends too much on pursuing and achieving self-imposed, very demanding standards, and keeps going despite the harm it causes (Shafran et al., 2002). What matters, then, is less how high the bar is than whether your whole sense of worth collapses when you miss it, and whether you cannot stop even as you pay the price.

It also differs from conscientiousness. In a meta-analysis of 77 studies and 24,789 people, perfectionistic strivings went with the Big Five trait of conscientiousness (r = .44), while perfectionistic concerns went with emotional sensitivity, or neuroticism (r = .50) (Smith et al., 2019). The authors of a meta-analysis on suicidal thoughts noted that conscientiousness moves in the opposite direction to such thoughts, whereas perfectionistic strivings moved in the same direction, and wrote that the reliable, self-disciplined behaviour of conscientiousness differs from the unrealistic goal pursuit central to perfectionistic strivings (Smith et al., 2018). You can look at conscientiousness in the Big Five test.

It is distinct from obsessive-compulsive conditions too. Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) involves unwanted thoughts that keep returning and repeated behaviours meant to ease the anxiety they bring (WHO, 2024). The ICD-11 classification describes personality disorder partly through trait domains, one of which is “anankastia”: a narrow focus on one’s rigid standard of perfection and of right and wrong, and controlling oneself, others and situations to ensure conformity to these standards. In ICD-11 a clinician first establishes whether a personality disorder is present and how severe it is, and only then describes it with such traits (Gecaite-Stonciene et al., 2021). That assessment is done by a professional. Among people treated for OCD, about 1 in 4 also had obsessive-compulsive personality disorder, and researchers regard the two as distinct conditions (Pozza et al., 2021). Perfectionism driven by fear of mistakes, anankastic personality traits and OCD can overlap, but they are not the same thing. The signs and treatment of OCD are covered in the OCD guide.

In a meta-analysis pooling data from 41,641 American, British and Canadian college students (164 samples) who answered between 1989 and 2016, all three dimensions rose steadily. The largest rise was in socially prescribed perfectionism, the sense that others demand perfection of you. If the average student in 1989 stood at the 50th percentile, the average student in 2017 stood at the 66th, which the authors expressed as a 32% increase. Self-oriented perfectionism rose by 10% and other-oriented perfectionism by 16% (Curran & Hill, 2019).

The trend continued in the same group’s follow-up analysis, widened to data up to 2024, 35 years in all, 307 samples and 82,939 students. Self-oriented perfectionism, concern over mistakes and doubts about actions rose in a straight line, while socially prescribed perfectionism climbed more steeply from the early 2000s. Where inequality rose, perfectionistic concerns rose more steeply, and the correlations between perfectionism and mental health problems did not change over time (Curran et al., 2026). These are college students in three countries, so the figures cannot simply be applied to Korea, and we found no comparable data on the Korean trend.

As for why, the authors regard parental expectations and criticism as the most plausible explanation offered so far. In a meta-analysis, parental expectations as children perceived them (r = .57) and parental criticism (r = .53) were strongly related to socially prescribed perfectionism, and college students’ perceptions of parental expectations and criticism themselves rose between 1989 and 2019 (Curran & Hill, 2022). These are correlations based on what children reported feeling, so they do not prove cause. The authors point to a society of rising competitiveness, individualism, economic inequality and pressure to excel at school and college as the backdrop (Curran & Hill, 2022).

There is a model of why perfectionism lasts. When you fall short of a standard, you criticise yourself; when you meet it, you re-evaluate the standard as not demanding enough and raise the next one (Shafran et al., 2002). So even success brings little lasting relief. Add repeated checking of your work to avoid mistakes, or putting off and avoiding tasks altogether, and you lose every chance to test whether the standard was really necessary, so the worry stays intact. CBT for perfectionism targets exactly these maintaining factors: repeated performance checking, self-criticism, procrastination and avoidance (Galloway et al., 2022). Ways to notice and examine thinking habits such as all-or-nothing thinking are covered in the cognitive distortions guide.

The link with procrastination runs in two directions. In a meta-analysis, perfectionistic concerns, worrying about mistakes and others’ judgement, went with more procrastination (r = .23), whereas perfectionistic strivings, setting high goals and working towards them, went with less (r = −.22) (Sirois et al., 2017). A Korean meta-analysis of 26 Korean and international papers likewise found that perfectionism felt as demanded by others went with more procrastination, and perfectionism that pursues one’s own standards with less (Kim & Seo, 2017). What helps with procrastination itself is covered in the procrastination guide.

Links with mental health show up across many problems. A meta-analysis of 284 studies and 2,047 effect sizes examined diagnoses and symptoms of depression, anxiety disorders, OCD and eating disorders, self-harm and suicidal thoughts, and general distress; both dimensions of perfectionism were associated with various forms of psychopathology, and the authors regard perfectionism as a factor that cuts across diagnoses (Limburg et al., 2017). Most of these were one-off correlations, so which comes first is hard to tell. In a meta-analysis of 10 follow-up studies and 1,758 people, however, perfectionism dimensions showed small links with later depressive symptoms even after baseline depression and neuroticism were taken into account (Smith et al., 2016). A meta-analysis of 43 Korean papers and 123 effect sizes likewise found that the concerns dimensions, such as concern over mistakes, doubts about actions, parental criticism and socially prescribed perfectionism, had medium or larger links with depression, while personal standards on their own had little (Lee et al., 2015). If you have felt low nearly every day for more than 2 weeks, read depression symptoms; if worry has spread across many areas for months, read anxiety symptoms.

It is also linked with burnout. In a meta-analysis of 43 studies, 9,838 people and 663 effect sizes, perfectionistic concerns had medium-to-large links with overall burnout, while perfectionistic strivings had small links in the opposite direction or none. At work, the strivings side was sometimes less helpful and the concerns side more harmful (Hill & Curran, 2016). You can see how worn out you are right now with the burnout self-check. Eating disorders are especially close. The researchers who built the clinical perfectionism model saw anorexia and bulimia as often direct expressions of perfectionism, with self-evaluation hanging on standards in the domain of control over eating, shape and weight (Shafran et al., 2002). Treatment models for eating disorders also list perfectionism among the processes that keep the problem going (Fairburn et al., 2003). If how much you eat or what you weigh has become the standard, read the eating disorders guide and have a doctor check your physical health first.

A link with suicidal thoughts has been reported too. In a meta-analysis of 45 studies and 11,747 people, perfectionistic concerns had a small-to-moderate association with suicidal thoughts (r = .28), and perfectionistic strivings a small one (r = .10). Socially prescribed perfectionism, feeling that others demand perfection, showed a small link with increases in suicidal thoughts over time even after baseline thoughts were taken into account (Smith et al., 2018). These are correlations, not causes, and having perfectionistic traits does not mean such thoughts will follow. Most people high in perfectionism do not have such thoughts. CBT aimed at perfectionism also reduced depressive symptoms (Galloway et al., 2022). If you are having thoughts of ending your life right now, please do not carry them alone: call or text 988 in the US and Canada, call Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland, or find a line at findahelpline.com elsewhere.

The aim is not to drop your standards but to test whether they are really necessary. CBT for perfectionism makes extensive use of surveys and behavioural experiments, built on an individual formulation of what keeps the perfectionism going, to test the beliefs that hold it in place (Galloway et al., 2022). Small experiments you can run yourself work on the same principle: send a report after checking it only once, send a message without re-reading it, or deliberately stop a task at “good enough” and write down what actually happens. Deciding in advance where “good enough” lies and stopping there is meant to cut the repeated checking that tries to rule out every mistake. The key is to record how often the feared outcome really occurred. If choosing wears you out because you keep hunting for the best option, satisficing, the same idea applied to choices, is covered in why deciding can be so hard.

Dealing with self-criticism matters too. In two studies, of 541 secondary-school students and 515 adults, the link between maladaptive perfectionism and depressive symptoms was weaker the higher people’s self-compassion was. These were one-off self-report surveys, so they cannot show cause; the authors wrote that self-compassion interventions may be useful and that experimental research is needed (Ferrari et al., 2018). You can see how you treat yourself after a mistake with the self-compassion test, and practices for treating yourself kindly instead of with blame are in how to build self-compassion. Self-compassion is not giving up your standards; it changes how you treat yourself when you fall short of them.

Guided self-help programmes have been tested as well. In a UK trial, 120 people were randomised to 12 weeks of internet-based CBT for perfectionism or a waiting list; concern over mistakes fell much more in the treatment group (d = 0.98), but 71% of participants completed fewer than half the modules, and the more modules people completed, the greater the change (Shafran et al., 2017). In a Swedish trial of 156 people randomised to an 8-week programme or a waiting list, effects were moderate to large (d = 0.68 to 1.00) and 44.9% of the treatment group improved markedly; the long-term benefits still need research (Rozental et al., 2017). Both programmes included a therapist’s guidance, so this does not mean a book or an app on its own gives the same result. If falling short of a standard leaves you feeling worthless, read signs of low self-esteem and see how much you value yourself right now with the self-esteem test.

There is psychological treatment aimed at perfectionism itself: cognitive behavioural therapy based on the clinical perfectionism model (Shafran et al., 2002). A 2015 meta-analysis pooled 8 studies of people with elevated perfectionism or a related diagnosis and compared before and after treatment. Personal standards, concern over mistakes and self-oriented perfectionism fell by a large amount, socially prescribed perfectionism by a medium amount, and anxiety and depression symptoms by a medium amount too. These are before-and-after figures, with no control group’s change subtracted (Lloyd et al., 2015).

A 2022 meta-analysis of randomised controlled trials only, 15 trials with 912 participants (mean age 23), found that CBT for perfectionism reduced personal standards (g = 0.57), concern over mistakes (g = 0.89) and clinical perfectionism (g = 0.87) by medium to large amounts, eating disorder symptoms (g = 0.61) and depressive symptoms (g = 0.60) by medium amounts, and anxiety symptoms (g = 0.42) by a small-to-medium amount. There was no evidence of publication bias. But the trials were few and none compared it with another active treatment, so this does not show it is better than other therapies, and participants were young, with a mean age of 23 (Galloway et al., 2022).

Perfectionism also affects the treatment of other problems. According to a clinical review, perfectionism predicted treatment outcome in OCD, social anxiety and depression, and treating perfectionism reduced anxiety, depression and eating pathology (Egan et al., 2011). So if you are being treated for depression, anxiety or an eating problem and the thought “if I can’t do it properly, I won’t do it at all” is getting in the way of treatment tasks, ask your therapist to work on perfectionism alongside. The treatment evidence in this guide concerns psychological therapy; treatment of depression itself is covered in what helps with depression.

Not everyone with high standards needs treatment. The clinical perfectionism model points to two signs: self-evaluation that depends so much on pursuing and achieving your standards that your sense of worth collapses when you miss them, and being unable to stop even though you are losing out in sleep, health, relationships or work (Shafran et al., 2002). If both persist and clearly get in the way of daily life, it is time to look at it with a professional. Talk to a mental health professional or a counselling service, or a university counselling centre if you are a student; elsewhere, start with your family doctor, who can refer you on. Secondary-school students can talk it through with a parent or a school counsellor.

Check whether something else sits behind the perfectionism too. If you have felt low and uninterested nearly every day for more than 2 weeks, look first at the depression check-in (PHQ-9) and depression symptoms; if worry has spread across many areas for months, at the anxiety check-in (GAD-7) and anxiety symptoms. If how much you eat or what you weigh has become the standard, have a doctor check your physical health and read the eating disorders guide. If unwanted thoughts keep returning and you cannot stop the behaviours meant to cancel them, see the OCD guide. These check-ins are not diagnoses; they help you look at how you are doing. Since perfectionism also affects how well treatment for these problems works, it is worth raising it with your therapist if you are in treatment (Egan et al., 2011).

If blaming yourself for falling short has led to thoughts of ending your life, please do not carry them alone. Reach out to a crisis line right away: call or text 988 in the US and Canada, call Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland, or find a line at findahelpline.com elsewhere. If you are in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services.

Q. Is there a perfectionism test? A. mind.io does not offer a perfectionism test. In research, Frost’s Multidimensional Perfectionism Scale and the Hewitt–Flett scale are widely used, and the 43 Korean papers on perfectionism and depression pooled in a meta-analysis mostly used these two as well (Lee et al., 2015). Perfectionism is not a diagnosis, so there is no test that diagnoses it. You can look at how you treat yourself after a mistake with the self-compassion test, and at how much you value yourself right now with the self-esteem test.

Q. Is perfectionism good or bad? A. It depends which side. The strivings side, setting high standards and pursuing them, can be positive as long as you are not overly concerned about mistakes and others’ judgement (Stoeber & Otto, 2006). But in a meta-analysis even the strivings side showed a small link with suicidal thoughts (r = .10), which led the authors to question the idea that strivings are healthy or adaptive (Smith et al., 2018). The concerns side, worrying about mistakes and evaluation, consistently goes with depression, anxiety and burnout (Limburg et al., 2017; Hill & Curran, 2016).

Q. Are perfectionism and OCD the same thing? A. No. OCD centres on unwanted thoughts and repeated behaviours meant to cancel them (WHO, 2024), while anankastic personality traits involve controlling oneself and situations to fit rigid standards and form part of a personality disorder assessment (Gecaite-Stonciene et al., 2021). About 1 in 4 people treated for OCD also had obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (Pozza et al., 2021). They can overlap, but they are not the same, and telling them apart takes a professional assessment.

Q. Can perfectionism be fixed? A. It can be reduced. In a meta-analysis of 15 randomised controlled trials, CBT for perfectionism reduced concern over mistakes by a large amount and also reduced depressive and anxiety symptoms, though the trials were few and none compared it with another treatment (Galloway et al., 2022). The goal is not to get rid of standards but to change how you treat yourself when you miss them and to test whether they are really needed.

Q. Did my parents cause my perfectionism? A. There is a link, but that alone does not make them the cause. In a meta-analysis, parental expectations and criticism as children perceived them were strongly related to socially prescribed perfectionism. These are correlations based on what children reported feeling, so they do not prove cause, and the authors point to a more competitive and unequal society as the backdrop (Curran & Hill, 2022).

Q. Blaming myself for falling short has got to the point where I want to disappear. A. Please do not carry that alone. Reach out to a crisis line right away: call or text 988 in the US and Canada, call Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland, or find a line at findahelpline.com elsewhere. If you are in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services.

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